


The shape of something new

by Fatale (femme)



Series: Ave Atque Vale [5]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, M/M, Vampire Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-30
Updated: 2018-01-30
Packaged: 2019-03-11 13:13:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13525014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/femme/pseuds/Fatale
Summary: Jace leans heavily against the glass display, ignoring the disapproving stares he gets from the sales associates, knuckles white, jaw clenching soundlessly, as he looks at the rows of rings, and Alec realizes he’s nervous. He could have had anyone come with him, but he asked Alec. Because Alec is his best friend and that’s what best friends do -- awkwardly try to talk their friends out of making poor life choices.





	The shape of something new

**Author's Note:**

> the end, the end, the end!
> 
>  
> 
> this is part of a series - you must read the rest for this to make any sense. set after "May cause temporary insanity."
> 
> fyi - sorry for the typos. i'm going to be so busy for a while and i wanted to get this done.

 

 

“You probably should have brought Izzy,” Alec says.

“She doesn’t know anything more about mundane customs than you do,” Jace says, walking towards an expensive looking jewelry store. He holds the door open for Alec.

“Then why are you even doing this?”

“Clary was raised mundane. I thought it would, I don’t know, be romantic or something.”

He doesn’t really know anything about romance, but Jace has put some actual thought into this, and that seems like something Alec should encourage.

“Yeah, okay,” Alec says, entering the store. All the employees are dressed in head-to-toe black, which should put Alec and Jace at ease, but Magnus must be rubbing off on him because even with his limited sense of fashion, he can tell their clothes are much, much more expensive.

He scans a row of rings nestled into inky velvet. Nothing has prices, which seems like a bad sign.

Jace draws a salary from the Clave, but it’s not generous. The way Alec see it, he either has the choice to pawn priceless artifacts or sell an organ, both of which are options that Alec disapproves of. He thinks - and it physically pains him to admit it - that Clary doesn’t seem like the materialistic type. He doubts she really cares about a mundane engagement ring; she’d likely be just as happy with the Herondale necklace Jace had made for her.

Pretty much anyone in their acquaintance is better suited to tell Jace this -- Izzy, Simon, hell, even Lydia.

Jace leans heavily against the glass display, ignoring the disapproving stares he gets from the sales associates, knuckles white, jaw clenching soundlessly, as he looks at the rows of rings, and Alec realizes he’s nervous. He could have had anyone come with him, but he asked Alec. Because Alec is his best friend and that’s what best friends do -- awkwardly try to talk their friends out of making poor life choices.

Alec leans over, touches Jace’s arm, muscles bunched beneath his hand. “Hey, hey, Jace. You’re going to be fine.”

Jace lets out a low breath. “And what about our lives so far makes you think that? I don’t know if you’ve been paying attention, but it’s been kind of a shit sundae.”

“Yeah, I noticed,” Alec says. “But things have been okay recently.”

“Have they?” Jace asks, voice rising. “Have they really?”

Alec looks around nervously as a sales associate heads towards them, probably to ask them to leave. It’s not the first time they’ve been kicked out of a place, but Alec would like to avoid it again if at all possible. He tugs on Jace’s arm. “Let’s go.”

Jace follows him, pale-faced, a familiar stubborn set to his mouth. In the sunlight, Alec can see dark smudges beneath his eyes.

Between the wedding, Magnus, and Simon randomly turning up with matching ironic t-shirts for them to wear, Alec hasn’t had a lot of time for Jace.

“All right, so what’s really bothering you?”

Jace pushes his hair back from his face impatiently, which Alec notes with amusement, immediately falls back. “Every time things are good, and it seems like our lives are okay, something completely fucked happens. Do you know what it’s like to keep waiting for the other shoe to drop?”

“Well, we both technically died, so maybe we’ve used all our bad luck for a while,” Alec reasons. “And hey, we made it through.”

Alec would rather be anywhere than here, having this conversation, but Magnus says avoidance and repression are terrible ways of dealing with issues, so Alec’s been working on it. And he’s getting better, sort of.

A funny look passes over Jace’s face that Alec can’t even begin to interpret. Jace chews his lip, takes a long shuddering breath. “You wouldn’t be if I’d had my way. I would have let you die rather than turn.”

Alec rocks back on his heels with the shock of it, the confession that’s been tearing Jace apart from the inside out. “It’s--”

“I made the wrong call,” Jace continues, breathing harshly.

“I don’t think you did,” Alec disagrees.

“But you’re really happy now.”

“Yeah,” Alec says, realizing it’s true. He’s married to the man he loves, he has friends and family and…he’s just really fucking happy. “But you couldn’t have known that and neither could I. And before, I think--I think that’s what I would have chosen for myself. You were just looking out for me, at least that’s how I see it.”

Jace’s shoulders slump, like a puppet with its strings cut. He looks lost, young.

“I can’t feel you anymore. There’s no bond, just--this space, where you used to be.”

Alec knows the feeling well. In the wee hours of the morning, sometimes when he can’t rest, he’ll mentally stretch out, reach for Jace through a connection that no longer exists, and the answering emptiness is crushing.

He’s spent a lifetime learning not to trust his feelings. And now, Alec makes a silent vow to spend this lifetime doing just the opposite. He wraps a hand around Jace’s arm, and pulls him into a hug, feels the solid pressure of Jace’s arms around him. They’ve lost their parabatai bond, but that thing was mostly a pain in the ass. They’ve still got _this_ bond.

“All right, enough with the mushiness,” Jace says, and Alec pretends he can’t see Jace surreptitiously wiping his eyes.

“Let’s go back,” Alec suggests and they begin walking.

Jace clears his throat. “You know, if you had to, you could drink from me anytime.”

“Why would you offer that?” Alec asks, horrified. “That’s really creepy, man.”

“Like, I know this sounds kind of gay, but it sort of felt good?”

Alec stares at Jace for a solid moment. “That’s incredibly gay.”

Jace rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, sorry, made things weird.”

Alec marvels at how far they’ve come, making vaguely offensive jokes about his sexuality, discussing the future without terror. He’s married to the man he loves, and Jace will soon be married to his short and improbably tiny soulmate. They’re doing mostly alright.

Jace’s gaze snags on Alec’s and suddenly, they’re laughing. It’s a little uncomfortable, bordering on hysterical, but it’s real. They're standing on the corner, staring dopily at each other. Alec can feel his joy bubbling over, smile stretching his cheeks until it hurts, squinting against the sunlight, bright and happy and free.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> “You going to let Magnus dress you for the wedding?”
> 
> “Until formal hoodies become a thing,” Alec says.


End file.
